I don’t know if this is a “me” phenomenon, but there’s this tension I live with that there is something worth knowing out there. Something just beyond my grasp. Kind of “the secret of life,” if you will.
And it mostly has to do with my faith, I think. Or maybe that’s not what it has to do with and I just think that’s what it has to do with.
Aren’t you glad you aren’t me? I’m messy.
I don’ think I’m crazy or anything, although you might. I just have always been a thinker, a daydreamer, a wonderer.
And so here are some pieces. Some things that get me wondering…
How come I can’t share Jesus in the traditional way we’re told He’s supposed to be shared? He’s such a big part of who I am. I know what He says. I know He says that no one comes to God except through Him. But I have such a profound respect for people of all faiths. If Jesus is such a huge part of who I am, why wouldn’t I think like Him? Why wouldn’t I have ironed this all out by now?
Is God sooooo huge that we’re all right?
Why do some people choose evil? Do they know they are perpetrating evil or do they think they are doing good?
Is there a reason for everything that happens? Or do some things just happen? Why have I been so blessed while other people suffer?
Is there something we are all missing? Some secret that is the key to living in harmony? We all say we want peace on earth and yet we are such a diverse and divisive people. We argue. And argue. And argue some more. We are all talking and nobody is listening. How do we heal this? How do we stop the bleeding?
Why is the world so broken, full of hurt people hurting people?
I know the answers are out there, just beyond my grasp. The pat answers don’t cut it for me. I believe the answers are much deeper than any human mind can explain. And there’s my answer, perhaps. The answers are too big to grasp. Way bigger than even the questions. But the answers are out there. I can feel them.